This is Hearbreaking!

Hello My Love,

Valentine's Day is rapidly approaching, and with its impending arrival I am filled with mixed emotions. We have discussed how like Christmas, New Years, and our birthdays, Valentine's Day is yet another holiday we will not celebrate. Yet another holiday we will pretend isn't happening, promising one another we will make up for it next year when you will hopefully be home.

Walking through the grocery store, I see the stacks of chocolates and people waiting in the checkout lines, arms full with red rose bouquets to be given to loved ones. I am instantly filled with sadness, not for a lack of chocolates and roses, yet rather the lack of your presence. It has been eight months since I last saw your beautiful smile and kissed you goodbye. A day that is meant to celebrate people's love and companionship is for me a day of intense loneliness. The only highlight will be crossing it off my calendar just before bed. How many more months to go?

I wish people could understand what I am going through. At times, I am filled with intense anger at the realization that so many people really don't get it. "Didn't you know what you were getting yourself into when you married a soldier?" they ask me. "No, I really didn't," is all I can say in response. I took no class on sleepless nights, nightmares, and anxiety attacks. No one explained to me the incredibly debilitating fear I would experience with the knowledge that my dearest love is in harm's way and no one sat me down to explain how intensely my heart would break at the mere thought of another Valentine's Day alone.
In addition to my sadness and anger, I find myself incredibly frustrated and perplexed as I ask myself for what is all this suffering? The Iraqis are worse off every day, and we are less safe here at home. America's global reputation and credibility lay in ruin, while countless Iraqis and Americans are dead.

The fact that with the arrival and passing of Valentine's Day I am brought that much closer to the time at which we will be reunited is what gets me through. Though the day remains uncertain, I eagerly look forward to the time at which I will once again be in your arms planting soft kisses all over your face. How badly I want you home now. How desperately I want this nightmare to be over. Stay safe, my love.

With all my heart,

Oriana Futrell